An unspeakable subject

I get wonderful home training lessons from Bible Study Fellowship and this weeks is reflecting the Woman at the Well. We read about a woman, born several years before Jesus probably around the year ... 10 or 20 BC; a real live woman who woke up every morning just like us. She was a woman who made all the wrong choices. She was brought up in a pagan society not having the truth, she did not have the basic wisdom available to us. Or maybe she just had a bad streak. Maybe she was oppositional and with her own stubborn self she did what she wanted and didn't care about the consequences. Who knows? But we do know she was now set apart from society. The others in her culture felt great disdain for her and as a result of being separated from the other women she chose to draw her water in the heat of the day.

Her life changed when she met Jesus. Even though Jesus was quite aware of her sin, He loved her. Because He did not let her sinful behavior restrict His love, He was able to help her.

In the same way the Lord Jesus loves us in spite of our sinful ways. We parents need to express the same unconditional love to our children so that we will be able to help them in their sinful nature. Loving our children because they are a precious creation of God rather then on their personal merits. 

Here is the unspeakable subject .. the unloving parent.
"Because individual human lives and human reactions can be so varied, it would be wrong to assume that every parent automatically has a deep love for his child. Perhaps for some reason you feel disappointment in a child in your family. This disappointment may be open and evident or you may think it is secretly hidden away. Rarely does this type of feeling remain a complete secret for long. Many adults have expressed these thoughts: I never knew why, and it was never just one incident of proof, but I always knew my parents were not totally accepting and proud of me. For as long as I can remember, it was evident that just did not like me.

There is benefit in evaluating any parental hesitancy toward loving a son or daughter. When recognized and given in honest confession to the Heavenly Father, inadequate love can be overcome and a change of heart can begin. The following are some questions that may help to expose resentment and a lack of love for a child.

1. Are you disappointed because your child is so plain or has a physical defect?

2. Have you rejected him, at times, because of what you consider to be his lack of appeal and charm or because he displays a character trait similar to some family member you do not admire? Or because he reflects a undesirable trait in yourself?

3. Do you think your child is not smart or is a slow learner?

4. Are you embarrassed by your child's hyperactivity or extreme shyness?

5. Was this child born out of wedlock, causing embarrassment to you and your family?

6. Do you resent the extra financial burdens this child causes the family?

7. Are you jealous because this child is more attracted to your spouses parents then to yours?

8. Do you love your child only when her or she obeys you or takes your advice?

Once exposed with honest thought and evaluation, these wrong attitudes can be rightly seen as the parent's problem rather then the child's. If this could be your situation, prayerfully confess your sin. Ask God to place in your heart His limitless love your your child. Then begin today to express in word, actions and attitudes of unconditional love for you child. Your obedience will be rewarded. Change can bring a new atmosphere to your home just as it did in the town where Jesus met the woman at the well. It may surprise you to sense the development of love that was previously missing. God will answer your prayer.

John 4:3-43